快乐与痛苦是连体婴，背对背，谁也少不了谁，是名副其实的‘痛快’i love this quote. no idea.. im weird i guess (: but who's normal anyway.. we all are living in a quirky world anyway ((:
It's funny the way life shows us what's important, what is not.
pretty sure that many people would feel the same way-- that is, when you're experiencing all the pressure, the rushing for dead-line... even the feeling of "what's the use, im dead" kind of feeling, all of us wants it to be over, as soon as possible. comtemplating on what to do after A's... all the japanese lessons, baking, or whatever enrichments planned.
the funny thing is.. for me, sure, i'm glad it's finally over. who likes to spend days hours to study anyway. but, then, what happen? i feel pretty lost. have no idea what i want to do with life. adults around me would remind me, your school life is the best part of your life. at those times, i thought i understand. maybe even now even as i thought that i understand it better, may not be the case. sure, with globalisation the world is not that big anymore. still.. it's big for one who have no directions in life.
no, i wont say that i enjoyed those days where i had to wake up early in the morning, ran to catch the train and bus to get to school on time. sure, i'll like the sleeping in times.. without worrying that i'm running late. but, as time passes.. it loses its meaning.
"to-day, what is to-day" i love lit precisely because i can quote any part of the texts which really a good representation of what i'm feeling right now. this quote is from Murder in the Cathedral it really just trying to say, days seem to be of the same weightage as one another, you won't know which are the days in which the choices you made, the actions you take will create a turning point in your life. It's only in reflection, when maybe years had passed.. when you look back and say "ah! that was the day!"
i guess the most important thing i can do now is to take each day on my stride, i won't know which one will make a difference in my life, that will be the surprise life has in store for me, but im sure i'll learn something out of it.
i haven't pack my luggage. this time, i think i'll be bringing most of my stuff over. you know.. sometimes i hoped that i'll get accepted into melbourne. well of course my mom cant really afford it for me. keeping in mind, my brother will be finishin high school next year too. but, there's a little part of me that wishes to be able to experience new things. sure, im scared, sure i'll worry. but then, if i don't break out from the safety of my cocoon, when will i learn to be totally independent?
of course, i'll miss my friends, teachers, family if i do really leave for melbourne (that is if i get accepted-- though i think it'll be pretty hard ><) and yes i find it pretty difficult to maintain friendship over long distance. can see my indon friends all become near strangers to me right now. i don;t know... sometimes, i also wishes to remain here...
